Do You Mind Switching Seats with Me?

How small gestures can lead to genuine connections.

“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you and devote yourself to creating something that gives purpose and meaning.” -Mitch Albom

Every day offers the same opportunity: To invest in activities, efforts, work and conversations that build others up or to choose attitudes, words and actions that push others down. The choice we make profoundly influences how we feel about our lives and our capacity to positively impact the lives of those around us. Let me explain.

After boarding a flight years ago, I settled into my typical in-flight routine: buckling my seatbelt, getting out a snack, setting up my journal and laptop, and preparing for a couple hours’ worth of work. (Want proof? The above photo was taken recently by my neighbor. We happened to be on the same flight to Orlando and their adorable little boy, Patrick, asked to sit next to me. Ironically, we have a similar amount of goodies to keep us both busy!)

Before I could get started, though, I overheard a conversation a row behind me that changed my entire focus.

An elderly-sounding woman shared with the person next to her that this was her first trip since the death of her husband.  She mentioned she was nervous to travel, but was looking forward to having someone to talk to on the trip.

The gentleman responded somewhat curtly, “I am really sorry to hear about your husband, but I am using this flight for sleeping, not talking.”

Now, I am not judging the man, but something in her voice spoke to me. It reminded me of the many times I’ve needed someone to talk to, a friend to lean on, someone to care.

Although already set up and about to tackle my to-do list, I shut the laptop, turned around and asked the gentleman if he wouldn’t mind changing seats with me.

And for the next 2 hours and 10 minutes I got absolutely no work accomplished. Instead, I received a living memoir from a new friend named Helen.

She shared about her impoverished childhood, unlikely marriage, experiences during World War II and raising her children. Stories she shared of sleepless nights, happy times and intense losses held deep truths about the agony of death, power of faith and gift of love.

She shared of losing two of her four children to separate accidents, a grandchild to AIDS, and most recently, her husband to heart failure. She shared not for attention or pity, but to impart the wisdom that in spite of the innumerable challenges of life, the journey forges us into the individuals we are perfectly intended to become.

After we landed, we unbuckled our seat belts, stood and hugged goodbye. Before the flight took off, I had left my seat to do something for her.  Hours later, I realized that the conversation had given so much more to me.

My friends, in the race through life, it’s common to get too focused on our calendar, our tasks, our stuff, our life. It is, however, in making time for genuine connection with others that we let go of what doesn’t matter, embrace what actually does and recognize that our lives are magnificent gifts. Gifts, by the way, not intended to be hoarded, but shared.

In these divisive days, perhaps it’s time to unbuckle and switch seats.

This is your day. Live Inspired.